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  • Writer's picturecrysmcgriffspeaks

TransparentC in Sharing

People say you learn about yourself during marriage. I am people. I became people during our 6 years of marriage. My husband and I have been on a debt free journey for almost two years now. And because of that we decided we would not renew our lease, but instead we would share our one vehicle that is already paid off. Although I was completely in agreement, I've dreaded the moment. Why? Well, during our marriage I've learned that I can be very inconsiderate.


considerate adjective

con·​sid·​er·​ate | \ kən-ˈsi-d(ə-)rət \

Definition of considerate 1: marked by or given to careful consideration 2: thoughtful of the rights and feelings of others


Now ya girl was in denial about it for a while. But the truth was, and sometimes still is, I think about me first and him second. What I want first and him second. It was God who turned on the light switch. That doesn't mean my husband never communicated that to me, it just means I never processed it, nor understood what he was trying to communicate.

Some of his complaints and request would just not click for me. And looking back now, some of it was simple common courtesy. But having two vehicles was an aide to my foolishness. If he doesn't want to go I can still go. If I don't want to go, he can still go. We agreed to be at two places at once, we can split up. But now that story has changed.

About two weeks had passed with this new vehicle arrangement and things were going pretty good. With Rona still having most things shut down we are pretty much together all the time. But one day it hit home for me my freedoms were limited lol. I told him I planned on running an errand after work. He followed with he was hanging out with some friends after work. I thought nothing of it, and responded with "cool".

Well, he gets off almost 2-3 hours before I do. He comes and says bye and leaves out the house. About 4 minutes later I realized he took the only vehicle we had and I would not be running any errands. I mean I completely forgot we only had one car. I ended up riding my bike to the store, and running the other errands the next day.

I'm learning to communicate better, listen better, and be more considerate and selfless. My friend, IT IS a process. Sometimes I do a poor job. Some days I do great. I take it a day at a time knowing my short comings and being intentional about making better choices. God has revealed to me something in my heart that needs correcting. And he is faithful and just to not only forgive, but also to help me overcome!

~A walk with God is an adventure!

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